I’m off to visit family and will take my usual 3 or 4 week hiatus from blogging during the trip.
However, this year, I’ve decided to part with my normal pre-trip strategy. Typically, I offer a very tame, boring, and non-controversial post right before I leave. This time, however, I am going to offer an irritating and tirade-laced monologue as I walk out the metaphorical door. [Apologetic Staff Note: Actually, in real life this is his typical mode of communication, so we're not sure what he's talking about when he says this is not "normal." He once went to a group of ranchers and said "so those wolves are pretty neat, huh?" and...then walked out of the room.]
In short, rather than giving you a warm fuzzy feeling for your holiday enjoyment (like, say, eggnog), I’m instead going to give you something more like pure annoyance (think pickle juice). Imagine reaching in your stocking and pulling out a live porcupine that has been sleep-deprived and trained by the U.S. military to attack you, and you’ll kind of get the feeling I’m going for.
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On the plus side, because I’ll only have sporadic access to the internet during my travels, you can pretty much rip my article to shreds and I’ll be totally helpless to defend myself! Now if that doesn’t feel “Christmassy,” I don’t know what does!
Happy holidays to you and yours!
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